A return to "The Way Up North Province"

You may remember my trip to Changchun last year, in which I hoped to never return in winter. Such thinking has a way of afflicting affecting your life, perhaps I sealed my fate with that wish. As it became apparent I'd be visiting again for a week in January and February, I nervously eyeballed the weather forecast. The weather-guesser told me to plan for days topping out around -10F and nights down around -33F...good thing I brought long-johns to China.

Snow Minnie Mouse and that other character I'm too old to recognize...as photographed from the taxi.

 
The extended forecast steeled my will as I prepared for the worst and hoped for the best. Lady luck was on my side and extended forecasts maintained their reputation as notoriously inaccurate. Nature dealt me weather with highs closer to freezing and lows bearably close to zero...and visibilities near zero as well.

China's air pollution has been in the news lately because Beijing has had troubles. My experience has been the problem is bigger than Beijing, Changchun being another particularly bad city. My habit of taking pictures from every hotel I visit finally paid dividends, as seen in the following comparison.

Two pictures taken from the same hotel, looking the same direction

The first day temps were high enough to melt some snow, which left a layer of filth all over the city. My theory is that snow grabs the air pollution from the sky as it falls. This is just a theory based on one day's experience, but have a look at the black stuff we were walking in.

Wipe your feet!

The cars did an even better job of displaying the filth.

A nice white Lexus

Eventually, the air returned to the "cucking fold" range on my thermometer and all the black schmuck refroze so we didn't track it indoors. I found the cold weather agreeable, as it was a good reason to warm up with coworkers around a delicious hot pot. Hot pot is similar to fondue, but instead of oil or cheese you use boiling soup to cook. Very delicious, even though it tested the limit of our expense book.

Hot pot!

Not every meal was high cost, as I again visited the dirtiest restaurant I have ever seen. It's the one located in an alley behind the place that has an English sign. It was still serving the best Chinese food I've had and the waitress was still in the mood to shamelessly flirt with a laowai. Visiting again for dinner gave me a chance to interact with a drunken Korean who held his nose like a pig after finding out I'm American.

Easily avoid eye contact thanks to this bathroom "door"

Again we finished up work a smidge early and had time to recreate. After spotting some ice skaters on TV, I asked Carl if he'd ever done any skating. He's from the south of China and had little experience with cold weather and ice skating wasn't available. He even had to buy a warm hat for this trip. We asked for some advice on where to go and found out the lake we toured last year offers skating. Back at the hotel, I put on all the clothes I brought and met Carl in the lobby for some cold outdoor skating

This is when I found out the Chinese word for "ice skating" sounds similar to the word for "snow skiing" and the concierge told us the lake had skiing...not skating. To skate we'd have to go to a mall, a place I later learned was the largest indoor mall in Asia. Seriously, it was huge.

In China, the Christmas season lasts well into Summer.

We paid 50RMB for an hour and rented skates. My big white guy feet pushed the limits of their rental skate inventory - settling of one size too small turned out to be OK. It had been a long time since my last skate session, so things started a little wobbly but it didn't take long to remember enough to have fun.

I look fat because I'm overdressed for indoor exercise.

Having worn too much clothing for indoor skating due to the communication error, an hour proved to be too long for me. I was really sweating by the end but Carl had a hoot. He started out with a few laps hugging the rail and by the end was brave enough to stumble around in the middle.

Carl having a life experience, not pictured is a huge smile

A young girl slid up next to me and asked in perfect English "Where do you come from?" I replied in Chinese "I am an American," and she ran to her mom yelling the Chinese words for "AMERICAN! AMERICAN! AMERICAN!" In my Chinese textbook "Where do you come from" is one of the first chapters, so I imagine English lessons here have a similar curriculum. Later she tried talking to me in Chinese and I had no idea what she said.

Still smiling

Another time I was run into by a young woman who had lost control. I saw her coming with just enough time to reach out and soften the impact. However, in reaching out I accidentally touching her breast - it happened so fast and I felt bad. She embarrassingly skated to her group of friends where they whispered and laughed.

Still smiling?

Skating was a spectacular end to what should be my final trip to Changchun. My company should have no reason to do business here in the future. It was great to provide Carl a chance to do something he should never have a chance to do again.

I shouldn't tempt fate again by saying I won't be back, but maybe next time will be warmer.

Such days are boring.

Sometimes it rains all day and we're stuck inside. Such days are boring.

A New Tailored Coat

Wow, it's really been a long time since the last post. We took a break from China to visit home for the Christmas holidays and after that we kind of spent some time getting readjusted to China life. Now things are clicking again and a conversation with friends recently reminded me that I need to post something to keep things fresh....so here you go...here's something...to keep things fresh.

Merry belated Christmas everyone!

I've been wanting to go have a sport coat tailored ever since Shayne had some maternity dresses made in Shanghai. I got some references for a good place in Suzhou and made it happen. Mr. Gu is a tailor in Suzhou New District and he has a card in the Expat Association's taxi card pack. His shop is located very near the Yushan Lu stop on subway line one and that might be the quickest way to get there from SIP. He seems to be liked by the expat community because he speaks pretty good English.

If you go there, it's best to know what you want - and specifics are important. Knowing I wanted a sport coat wasn't enough. You've got to know specifics such as the style, the fit, the color, the pocket and lapel style...do a little research to make the process smooth. The customer service was a bit rushed brief so it helped a lot to bring in this picture and say "I want this but not plaid."

Mr. Gu took a look at my picture and said "what about the back?" I guess it's best to also know about the back, we discussed a little and decided on one slit and I assume he knows enough to fill in the blanks. After looking at the picture, we had to pick a fabric and I found a navy blue I liked in 100% wool. Then he took my measurements and said "500RMB, 200 now and the rest in 10 days when you pick up."



I went back after ten days and tried on my new coat. A very good slim fitting jacket, exactly like I wanted. And for around $80 it is hard to complain about being rushed through the first visit. It certainly beats driving all the way to Shanghai to work with a tailor I pick out randomly. I might go back and get one in dark grey...or maybe a full suit.

Tongli (feat. China Sex Culture Museum)

Clif took a vacation day and we visited Tongli to celebrate his birthday. That was a few weeks ago and what started as laziness turned into forgetfulness with regards to writing this blog post. But fear not, here is a much needed update so you can "keep up."

Tongli is a little touristy town located within the city of Suzhou. Even though we live in the same "city," it took around 45 minutes to drive there from our home. This is because Chinese "cities" are more like what Americans consider counties....it's all just semantics but saying something is in Suzhou doesn't really tell you much other than it's west of Shanghai and east of Wuxi.

Mr. Wang took us to a parking lot and pointed toward a building, which was labeled as the ticket office. We asked for "liang ge" tickets and received two in exchange for 200RMB. After that, the clerk took on an inquisitive look and pointed at an English sign that read something like "storage car battery: 5RMB." We didn't know what that meant, so we declined. She nodded and pointed down the road in the direction we should walk.

These birds dive under water and bring back fish to the owner

We walked down the road in the direction she suggested and quickly realized we had no idea what was going on. We expected an ancient village and canals lined with cobble stone walk ways. What we found was a modern city that is representative of almost all Chinese cities. Luckily we noticed some green golf carts shuttling white people around, so we followed them on foot for about 2 miles.

Eventually we got to the gate of the ancient part of town where a security guard checked our tickets. Outside the gate was a "storage battery car shuttle stop" where the green carts were dropping people off...and we learned that a "storage battery car" was a shuttle and we should have paid 5RMB to save wear and tear on our shoes.

One of the big Tongli attractions is the China Sex Culture Museum, so naturally we headed straight for that. Well actually we didn't go straight there, it was more of a zig-zag because we didn't know where it was. Actually we could see it on the map, but we couldn't see ourselves on the map.

While it might sound like a pornographic type place, it was actually fairly educational. Inside they had a huge collection of artifacts, artworks and ancient...ahem...tools - most of those wooden.

Click for more pixels only if you appreciate art

Another valuable lesson for anyone following our footsteps is that the China Sex Museum bathrooms are markedly clean by local standards....and perhaps bathrooms such as those are worth the 20RMB entry fee even if you don't poke around the exhibit.

Siddhārtha? Is that you?

The Sex Culture Museum was extremely interesting. It took a while to meander through the displays and I took a lot of pictures even though the signs forbid pictures. But this is China and people here don't follow rules. So many pictures in fact that the camera battery died and we didn't have any juice to take pictures during the rest of our day in Tongli's other areas.

Best job ever?

Unfortunately, most of the pictures are a little X-Rated and I shouldn't put them here. So if you're interested, come over and we'll show them....there are a couple really interesting ones.

Prostitute's bed on the left, sex chair on the right.

After the museum, we were hungry and a friend recommended a little coffee shop that was high priced and westernized. Which means it wouldn't be crowded and somehow we actually found it quickly among the maze of walking streets. We paid way too much for a couple slices of ham, cheese and a too much mayonnaise on croissant roll...but it was good and MJ got to stretch her legs a bit.

MJ emerges from the baby backpack cocoon and begins to wake up

From the seat, we looked out the window and saw a fairly typical sight. This woman was selling random crap that apparently people buy. We see little shops like this everywhere, and we always see little kids playing with those toys nearby. They stand there waiting for people to walk by, and when someone does they pick up a do-dad and demonstrate it's function while yelling.

Awaiting the next passers by

Business was slow, so this woman took a moment to clean her dishes in the super clean canal water. And by super clean, I mean not as polluted as the water near our home..

Here is the final lesson for other people who go to Tongli. Don't bring a stroller! They are a pain on the rough streets and you have to lift them over steps and door sills everywhere. We were happy to also have the baby backpack to keep from shaking MJ too much on the street, but we still had to drag the stroller around.

But having an empty stroller provided some humor. Chinese people LOVE to look at white babies and when they see the stroller they always rubber neck to see her. Almost everyone was so focused on sneaking a peak into the stroller, they failed to spot the baby strapped to Shayne. And when they realized the stroller was empty, they were always shocked and sometimes gasped in confusion. "Why are these laowai pushing an empty stroller?"

These fancy doors where everywhere

We also visited one ancient residence that had been ruined during the cultural revolution because the government used it as a stable. In recent years it has been rebuilt and restored to "it's original beauty."

This is the ceiling of a stage, the round part is about ten feet in diameter.

Tongli is a very interesting place. It's quite large and we spent a day and didn't see much of it - we'd love to go back. Next time we'll pay for the "storage battery car" and we'll leave the stroller at home. We might even pay 20RMB again to use a proper pisser.

Sugar Cane - Split and Spit

Thanks to Alva for sharing some of her sugar cane with me. Luckily the eating technique was also shared: Split the cane with your teeth and peel back the hard green outside. Bite a chunk of the crisp white innerds and chew out the juice. Spit out the remains. Tastes like sugar water...a nice treat.

I recommend caution while you peel it. You're one sneeze away from scrapping boogers off the candy.